The Boundary of Capacity
Aug 31
/
Regina Lowe
Note: this newsletter article is a follow up to the Missouri Annual Conference Board of Examiners presentation on Boundaries, August 31, 2024.
As a reminder, boundaries are defined as:
"A border with a gate that is only opened or closed by you. You're able to determine what you let in and what's kept out."
There are many ways boundaries are useful:
- They help you establish priorities.
- They're a compass or guidepost for decision-making (saying yes or no).
- They're not meant to control others.
- They keep you from going after the "should's"; leading to more fulfillment and fruit as you pursue God's call.
- They're essential for a healthy, long-term, ministry.
Another useful tool when establishing your boundaries is the concept of 'capacity'.
Merriam-Webster defines capacity as:
"The potential or suitability for holding, storing, or accommodating. The maximum amount or number that can be contained or accommodated."
When thinking about your capacity as it relates to boundaries, consider these questions in prayer:
What is your potential or suitability for the demands, requests, and expectations of your time and efforts?
What is the maximum amount of demands, requests, and expectations can you accommodate?
Presiding Elder Lowe describes capacity visually as trying to pour 16 oz. of water into an 8 oz. container. At some point, the 8 oz. container will refuse to hold, store, or accommodate any more water because it is beyond its capacity.
Click here for a visual.
As I pondered this visual, what came to mind is the water that cannot fit into the 8 oz. container, and is running over, represents our mental conditions, stress, anxieties, and ill health. A lack of, or porous, boundaries causes us to allow more demands to be poured into us than what we're able to handle. And what pours out are chronic diseases, mental health challenges, strained relationships, and more.
[Note: this is almost the inverse of what we want from God. As containers, we do want God to continually pour into us even as we overflow. The overflow in this situation represents the outpouring of the Holy Spirit and the grace of God that allows us to drink from our saucers when our cup overflows.]
The 8 oz. container represents our entire lives, including ministry. Some of the water in the container represents sleep, some fun time, some family time, etc. As we consider our boundaries, we must consider our lives holistically.
The tool I like to use here is a 24-hour daily schedule. Plot a day in your life from midnight to 11:59 p.m.
In prayer, consider these questions:
Click here for a visual.
As I pondered this visual, what came to mind is the water that cannot fit into the 8 oz. container, and is running over, represents our mental conditions, stress, anxieties, and ill health. A lack of, or porous, boundaries causes us to allow more demands to be poured into us than what we're able to handle. And what pours out are chronic diseases, mental health challenges, strained relationships, and more.
[Note: this is almost the inverse of what we want from God. As containers, we do want God to continually pour into us even as we overflow. The overflow in this situation represents the outpouring of the Holy Spirit and the grace of God that allows us to drink from our saucers when our cup overflows.]
The 8 oz. container represents our entire lives, including ministry. Some of the water in the container represents sleep, some fun time, some family time, etc. As we consider our boundaries, we must consider our lives holistically.
The tool I like to use here is a 24-hour daily schedule. Plot a day in your life from midnight to 11:59 p.m.
In prayer, consider these questions:
- How much sleep do I want/need?
- How much down time do I want/need?
- How much time is needed for work (including commuting)?
- How much time is needed for personal hygiene, eating, etc.?
- How much time is needed for God, studying, and prayer?
Continue to ask these types of questions until you've plotted out an entire 24-hour day of your life. What do you see?
Remember that boundaries are a border with a gate. The gate is truly important. This helps us understand that boundaries can be adjusted based upon our seasons in life.
In seminary? You may need to adjust your boundaries. Are all of your children on their own now? You may need to adjust your boundaries. There are times when we will be able to give more and times when we need to tighten up. And it's ok. Checking in with God about your season of life can help determine how you need to establish your boundaries.
Finally, consider these scriptures about rest. They help us to further understand the importance of boundaries:
Matthew 11:28-30
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.
Hebrews 4:9-11
There remains, then, a Sabbath-rest for the people of God; for anyone who enters God's rest also rests from their works, just as God did from His. Let us, therefore, make every effort to enter that rest, so that no one will perish by following their example of disobedience.
Psalm 127:2
In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat - for He grants sleep to those He loves.
How is God asking you to rest and what are the boundaries He wants you to establish?
In seminary? You may need to adjust your boundaries. Are all of your children on their own now? You may need to adjust your boundaries. There are times when we will be able to give more and times when we need to tighten up. And it's ok. Checking in with God about your season of life can help determine how you need to establish your boundaries.
Finally, consider these scriptures about rest. They help us to further understand the importance of boundaries:
Matthew 11:28-30
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.
Hebrews 4:9-11
There remains, then, a Sabbath-rest for the people of God; for anyone who enters God's rest also rests from their works, just as God did from His. Let us, therefore, make every effort to enter that rest, so that no one will perish by following their example of disobedience.
Psalm 127:2
In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat - for He grants sleep to those He loves.
How is God asking you to rest and what are the boundaries He wants you to establish?
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